Monday, February 25, 2013


To my mind, police is the most misunderstood function of the government in today’s India. Damned if we do and damned if we don’t. I must at this juncture mention that these are my private views. I am solely responsible for all the feelings my words evoke in you: bad, good or ugly. I am speaking from the point of view of all the upheaval in society that is visible today. The mass protests, the rise in crime, the intolerance, the corruption, the increasing chasm between the haves and the have nots: the list is endless. At no point I am saying the police is not to blame, but tell me honestly, what about the society at large. Crime and punishment are both functions of the same society. What are you protesting?? Do you even know what you stand for? Are you against the government? Are you against the mindset of the rapist or the abuser? Are you against the laws? Are you against yourself?? Are you against crime? What do you stand for? I fail to understand. There may be tough questions to answer. Today it seems like every one wants to break a law and do something illegal. All they want is to get away with it. Getting caught is the biggest problem. What is the difference between a youngster on a bike jumping the red light and a criminal dumping a murdered body on the highway?? They both want to get away with committing the crime. I am not comparing the severity of the crime or the harm that they have wreaked upon the society; but I am comparing the underlying similarity. Ponder upon another question if you will. What do you want the police to do, mean or be? This is an answer I want from all sections of the society. Politicians, students, housewives, activists, media et al. What do you want from the police? Want us to turn a blind eye to your riding without a helmet? Want us to arrest all the corrupt? Want us to enforce and uphold the law? Want us to allow you to vandalize government property? There is this popular refrain that is prevalent. That the police are corrupt; that the police are stooges of the ruling class; that the police are ineffective; that the police only pressurize the weak; that the police are criminals in uniform. Should the Union of India scrap the police altogether? Should we remove all laws?? If the police were so inefficient then how has the society functioned so far? I don’t mind being yelled at and pointed a finger to. I am after all a police officer. I have worn the uniform as a badge of my contribution to the society. I am doing the best I can; given the circumstances. It was evident to me long ago that as a cop, no matter what I do, I will never be liked by the society. Yet I chose to be here and to uphold the law because I believe without it there will be anarchy. I believe in strict implementation and I believe the Indian laws are adequate. I also believe that reforms are needed in the policing system of the country. I want dignity for each and every police man or police woman on the street. There are problems within and there are problems without. While on one side police will be revered only when the corrupt practices inside the police department are weeded out, on the other hand there needs to be a working interface of the community with the police and the policing system so that they understand what the police stands for and what are the constraints of the legal system within which the police has to operate. Tolerance on the whole of the misuse of power and money has to end. However with it needs to end the reliance on hooliganism and demands for street justice. Retribution and revenge are not the marks of a civilized society. Industriousness and probity are. There is no need to make every issue ‘police vs. people’. Police is not opposed to anything so long as it is legal. The police are there to facilitate safety and security of the people. That does not mean that there is a policeman with each and every citizen. It means the fear of the law will ensure that people do not commit heinous crimes on each other. If crime rates are increasing it means the society does not believe in the legal system. This is what needs to be addressed. The Police as part of the Criminal Justice System need to be sensitized to the needs of the society. The numbers in the force have to be in an adequate ratio with the population. Women in the police need as much protection as those without. While self reliance is the best solution, respect for the rights and privileges of all human beings is the important key. Perhaps that is what we have forgotten. While the media rakes up its TRP, we allow the travesty of social angst to reach our young who cannot seem to fathom the reasons as they are unclear to all. Women have been commodified. Police has been demonized. Politicians have been vilified. In the process we have forgotten what it means to be human.

Tuesday, May 24, 2011

salt river and the snake..

it takes a very long time to get unused to something in life, especially if it's the good things of our small little petty existence..
thank god it's raining outside. at least some succor to my heartburn..
i seem to be sighing a lot more.. taking a lot more deep breaths.. i'm this close to shutting my phone off. i guess it's always the worst before it gets better. or so i choose to rationalize and fool myself.

imagine having to censor each word, each move, each action. difficult life ahead.

and all i want is a classic 500!

Tuesday, May 03, 2011

early morning chill.. rain drenched asphalt.. steel..
the stirrings of a city.. other stirrings as well.


of course, the inspiration yet doesn't follow.. but like an old man trying out some viagra for the first time and settling down to check the effects on him with a dose of free porn on the internet, i wait titillated.. maybe i'll be able to paint again. maybe i'll be able to write again. perhaps the words will flow just as the river erodes the island regularly and relentlessly. perhaps not.. why does it feel like i've done this before. a yes and a no. this has been the crux so far. so far being just the last couple of years.. can i read the old books again? will i fall in love with the pages like i did the last time.. just as i'm afraid to go back to an old boyfriend after a breakup, i'm scared to read a book that i love the second time.. what if? what if i don't enjoy it so much..

what if i'm just rehashing.. just like i found out that be 23 if you like jokes, you've probably heard them all.. at 30, you've written it all?? no more new thoughts?? what's wrong??

Thursday, January 21, 2010

23 days: a tale of toughening up

it's been a while since i wrote anything, and now i realize that unless i feel very passionately, i don't have words.. think what you may wanna of that.. i realized that i'm very passionate about myself, what happens to me and whatever is mine, is of my utmost concern.. i just can't take it if what i perceive as wrong happens.. and i gotta get out of here, this little pond where each frog thinks he's the cock of the walk.. Nah, man.. you're just another toad. and where you sit is yet another toadstool..

i've had to do some things which i never thought i'd need to.. all this while, i was under the impression that merit counts.. sure i was never naive, i knew a little bit of networking and some right posturing also would go a long way.. yet, i never knew that sheer idiocy or stupidity or vindictiveness or vengefulness or laziness (i haven't been able to pinpoint the reason as yet) could hold sway in today's world.. but then all's well..

i still don't know what i'm made of.. i still don't know if Gurdieff was right.. in those 23 days, i've kicked, screamed, shouted, flexed my muscles, made noise enough number of times.. the days of despair i can count as 5 perhaps.. those days, i turned inwards completely.. didn't want anyone to know how strong i felt inside.. thing is that today, i still don't know what happened, how and why.. it's all a big mystery..

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

The Aufbau Principle

“You just sit there… don’t look up. Don’t look in the eye. Don’t look! …act as if he’s invisible. He’ll just go away… or else the light will turn green and soon you’ll drive away. You’ll be home and then you can forget about it.” These are the first thoughts.

A deeper thought if ever taken reveals that one never wanted to forget about him. All of the ignoring actually means that he was never in your mind. The teeming million poor people are never in our minds. In fact no one else ever is. I know for a fact.

How did we ever organize ourselves in this society this way? Who made the rules? I am embarrassed, but I’ll tell you. I ignore all those little boys and girls begging at every crossing in Delhi. I don’t look at them in the eye. I look through them. I act as if they’re invisible. I roll up the window. I rev the engine. I rush away as soon as the light turns green. I don’t want to give any money as I know that one coin will bring in twenty more outstretched palms. Or will it? I don’t know. I’ve run away every time. I’ve never checked it out.

Who put them there in the first place? Is that very naïve of me to ask? Should I just let that question be? Can I ever find answers to that question? Or will it be entirely clouded with concepts of economics, development strategy, political will, gross domestic product, manufacturing sector, insurgency etc etc etc ad nauseum.

The simple fact of life: “hungry stomach needs food” has today been confused and manipulated to such an extent that we have nations of obese people co-existing in the world along with malnourished nations all in the same world. But it doesn’t matter right: it’s not your country, it’s not your home, it’s not your problem.

Who is to blame? Or is it not about a blame game? The ancient Indians would have us believe it is karma. Some are destined for greatness, some are destined for poverty. Or is it that some work harder than the others? What is the role of equal opportunities? What if I am a closet literary genius of the Swahili language? I just never got the opportunity to blossom that talent, having been born in India. Or is it that I was never meant to?

Monday, June 01, 2009

of longing and belonging...

as days give in to other days and nights give in to rainy mornings, one wonders at the sense of delight God must feel with his little toys.. US

He plays with our hearts, or bodies, our cars, our houses and He presumable has fun... oh! right, lemme play with that road.. a little tweak and voila! An accident... else, it's Ah shit.. missed again! heard that joke?? let's just put this girl there and that boy there, they'll meet after so many years, but wait!! Things can't be easy, even after they meet, lemme put some other factors like work for instance and keep them apart..

Let's make him enticing, but let's have them stay apart.. each day a struggle, each moment a bit of pain.. Well, when they meet sparks fly asunder, but the yearning.. Oh the yearning..


Saturday, May 30, 2009


I'm in a dangerous mood... wanna do something crazy and spontaneous... i hate my existence where each moment is recorded and tagged and verified and corrected and placed in custody... He can't come, i can't go.. I yearn. Oopli tuplis..

Why do we work? So that we have ample time for leisure... i work and then work some more.. so does he... i wait, so does he.